[Cambodian-American] Mother's chronic illness drains family funds

Thursday, December 10, 2009
The Mercury (Pennsylvania, USA)

Dahlia and her husband Ron have been struggling for years to support their two children ages 4 and 8.

Even though Ron has held down a steady job as a customer sales representative for 12 years, the family can barely make ends meet. Dahlia's health problems and the related medical bills have left them with touchy finances.

Their troubles started about seven years ago when their son, Jude, was only a year old.

Dahlia, an immigrant from Cambodia, began experiencing mysterious medical symptoms that made it difficult for her to walk. She visited her doctor, who, unable to make a diagnosis, sent her to a team of specialists in Philadelphia.

She underwent a battery of tests, and, over a period of three years, was seen by a number of doctors who ultimately concluded that Dahlia was suffering from post-traumatic stress syndrome.

"I grew up in Cambodia and went through the war," Dahlia explained in a recent telephone interview with The Mercury. "The doctors say I am lucky. Many people who have been through what I went through wind up in a mental institution."

Her childhood was marked by extreme poverty and abuse that left deep, emotional scars. She came to America in 1985, sponsored by a religious organization, and today she is grateful for the life she shares with her husband Ron and their two young children, Jude and Eleanor.

Ron has been deeply supportive of her.

He's worked for a large firm as a customer service representative for more than a decade, and sometimes puts in long hours.

He earns a decent salary, but it's not enough to fully support the family of four, especially since he is still paying off medical bills that were not covered by their insurance.

"My husband is a hard worker. He does what he can for our family, but it's a hardship for him to feed all four of us," Dahlia acknowledged.

She wishes she could help make ends meet in some way, but she still has symptoms that make it difficult for her to work. And right now, the family only has one car, so she also faces transportation difficulties, as well.

Therefore, she devotes herself fully to raising Jude and Eleanor. Jude is now in school full-time, but she can't afford to send Eleanor to a preschool. Instead, she teaches the 4-year-old at home daily to make sure she'll be ready for kindergarten next year.

The family has fallen behind on many of their bills, and even the rent on their small two-bedroom apartment is a month overdue. Dahlia knows she can't spend precious money buying her children toys for Christmas.

"My daughter, she has a long list of things she wants. Someone gave her a My Little Pony toy and now she wants all of them," Dahlia said, chuckling slightly. "But my son, he's grown so much this year, he just needs clothes. He especially needs a winter coat."

She's thankful that Operation Holiday can help her provide her children with a few gifts that she knows will be much appreciated on Christmas morning.

While Dahlia can see no immediate relief from their financial difficulties, she remains optimistic that the coming year will be a better one for her and her family.

"I'm hoping that we can get out of debt and move into a larger home someday," she said. "I don't give up hope and I don't give up faith."

The challenge for Operation Holiday is greater than ever in this 19th year of its existence. The program, which began in 1991 at The Mercury, has distributed more than $1 million in food and gifts to thousands of needy families during the holiday season, all through the generosity of readers.

Last year, Operation Holiday raised more than $59,000 to provide food and gifts to 150 families and 403 children. The program is completely managed and administered by employees of The Mercury. There is no overhead, and every dollar is distributed locally to families referred from local service agencies.

The program has been expanded this year to 200 families with more than 500 children. Each family will receive food for a holiday dinner and staples for the pantry. Gift cards will be provided to families to buy gifts for each child under the age of 17.

Operation Holiday is funded solely by readers' contributions. The names of all those who contribute except those who wish to remain anonymous will be printed in The Mercury between now and Dec. 24. All contributions are tax deductible.

Contributions may be mailed or brought to the offices of The Mercury, P.O. Box 484, Pottstown PA 19464. Make checks payable to Operation Holiday.